Richard Rohr (LOVE him!) wrote that conservatives have old minds and old ideas; liberals have new minds and old ideas; and contemplatives have new minds and new ideas...I am trying to move from liberal to contemplative. Recently, I found that looking at family in a contemplative way is exciting and liberating. I have been thinking about this for quite a while, but it wasn't until this month of November when I was inspired to write about a definition of family (with a new mind of course). What occasioned this? My middle grandson, Jack, celebrated his 14th birthday this month and a week later, he celebrated his Confirmation in the Catholic Church. Our family gathered for both celebrations....enjoying Jack's special moments and each other.
When I was a young girl, a child of the 50's, family was defined by TV sitcoms: "Father Knows Best", "Ozzie and Harriet", etc. The family here was mom, dad and children. Period. A happy unit with some small disagreements which were settled miraculously in thirty minutes and then all was well. As a young wife these pictures formed my illusion of family, although disagreements were rarely settled in thirty minutes and family now included various in laws. I became a single mom in the 80's. Family was my son, my daughter and myself. Period. I just couldn't see that my ex (and his new wife) fit into that picture at all.
Fast forward to this month and I am a grandmother with three fabulous grandchildren. I watch as we all celebrate occasions: birthdays, sacraments, holidays, etc. My now contemplative mind sees family as my daughter and her three children, my son and his long-standing girl friend, my children's father and his wife, and of course, my brother, my sister-in-law, my nephews, and so on.
The point here is that family is a group tied together in some way who celebrate good times and stand by you in those times when you can't stand by yourself. Interestingly, that tie is usually a child or children....Jesus told us that we need to become like little children....to accept as they accept...to see as they see...to love as they love. Now, that's what family is to me. How has your perception of family changed over the years?
